My grandfather was a farmer. He used to tell me stories about aliens and what not. This one he told me however, was quite odd, so here it goes
It was back in the olden days when things started getting weird at my farm. *cough* One day while going out to milk the cows, I noticed that they acted like something just hit their scalps. They were all scared of something I didn't know what the hell it was since I just got out of bed.
It was sunny outside; they shouldn't be scared. So I just walked on down and milked the cows then I saw a sudden flash at the corner of my eye! I turned around to see nothing, so I just kept on milking the cow until I heard a loud bang on the side of the farm.
I went to check it out to see, a dent in the door. I walked back to the cows to keep milking them, but they were all gone. Outta site, I paid lots of money for them cows and their all suddenly gone!
I kept working for the day angry that my cows were gone then went back to the house to fetch up some grub. Once I got inside the whole god damn place was trashed, couches on walls plates on floors, the sink was clogged up and the toilet too! I was so angry I hit the wall making a hole in it. Then I heard a car motor, it was strange for any cars to be out in the country.
So I went outside to see a solid black car in the middle of the dirt road, and I saw two men wearing black suits with sun glasses on and a tie. They were walking around with some kinda techno shit, then I walked over to them and said, "Hey! what the hell you think your doing?"
One of the men looked over to me while the other was just checking out the farm, he then walked over to me and said, "Sir, I have a few questions to ask you." I replied "Oh really?"
"My grandfather was rambling on about the questions so its best if I skip this part!" After he got finished asking questions he told his partner to follow him back to the car.
Then they drove off. I went back into the house to figure out it was already 10:00 PM! I decided to get some sleep.
The next morning I awoke to a crash in the kitchen, I got up and got my pocket knife out. I walked slowly into the kitchen to see a tall son of a bitch fucking messing up my fridge taking all the damn food out and crushing it and eventually throwing it onto the floor.
It was a mess, then! It stopped what it was doing to turn around and see me! It was fucking hiddeous! Fucking big ass eye balls, naked standing there, it had 5 mother fucking arms. and it was skinny, it had 2 legs no goddamn dick, just standing there watching me.
It then raised its hand and I raised my knife. We both then started walking around one another in a circle just fucking having a stare down waiting for someone to do something.
Finally we both stopped and stood there, waiting, suddenly I was so tired I decided to sit on the couch, I was walking backwards to the couch, looking at the thing while it was looking at me. I then sat down and watched it!
After a few hours we both heard a loud bang crash and a faint zoom. It then ran outta the house to the fucking field.
I followed and ran then once I stopped I saw a big fucking metal piece of some kinda spaceship! I saw two other things that helped the one I was having a stare down with, they were lifting it up into the ship metal thingy.
Them rascals took off right after! Two days later the same thing happened only this time both the men in the black suits were there. they were hiding behind the barrels of wine with their guns out.
I saw the ship come down and saw as it opened the door, I saw mah cows they were all there! Safe and sound! then two things came outta the ship coming towards the house, I was watching as the men ran over towards them and shot both of them!
After that I saw one guy get his arm cut off by one of those things and the other got thrown onto the black car leaving a big dent. Both were killed! Then the things started coming towards the house examining me! Then one of them spoke to the other in a weird voice.
I couldn't understand what they were saying. Then both of them took a big metal thing out then shot me! The next morning I woke up. I was in bed with two tracking darts on meh! I couldn't take em off. And to this day, them things are tracking me!