"What if God is a big pile of Meatloaf? What happens then, Ms. Lunch Lady?!?!?"
Watching Smiley: "So wait a minute. We're talking about a guy who has sewn his eyes shut and mouth closed...with no nose. So he's a guy who can't see, or breath?"
"A Penetration Round is not a Full Metal Jacket sex toy."
"Softball is not a medical condition."
Watching "Don't hug me, I'm scared" - "It's a reference to how kids, like the bird, red cthulhu thing, and...whatever the crap the other one is, are being told to express themselves and be creative, when the notepad is only accepting the ideas she likes and is demeaning them every time for their creations. Thus, they create insane and quite sociopathic creations as a result of being repressed. It's a nod to how kids aren't allowed to express themselves properly in Kindergarten and Grade School and have their expressions and ideas taken away by the totalitarian indoctrination system. Thus, later on, these kids become psychotic depressed people and are inclined to commit violence later on in their lives."
"Sorry, I always thought Pansexual meant you like to F*ck cookware."
"God is non-existent? God is about as existent as your d***. Be careful how you answer that."
"A random guy walked up to me and said 'How about some cheek-to-cheek, honey?' I responded, 'If by cheek to cheek you mean, your face cheeks kissing my @ss cheeks, then you better get started."
"I find nothing more astonishing than a person who choose to have their fate decided for them...by a chinese cookie."
"Sorry, but Marilyn Manson is not the new Alice Cooper, and NEVER will be.
Black Veil Brides are not the new KISS, and NEVER will be.
Blood on the Dance Floor is not a band, and NEVER will be."
"It's always the "you're only going to miss it when it's gone". It happens in death, it happens with belongings, it happens with just about anything that you ever take for granted. That you never actually *think* about."
"I always ask my mates "So how's things going?" or "How are you doing?" and they'll always say "not much going on"...Well I ain't seen them in months and there must be something that had happened or their lives have gotta be boring. Which is funny, because people ask me that same question, and yet I answer "I'm doing alright, not much going on.' "
"I'd just like to point out that God killed millions of people in the bible when he sent the floods and that's a children's story. Christ died a brutal, terrible, humiliating death when all he had ever shown was kindness and humanity, and that's an R-rated movie."
Continuation: "This ties in with the fact that you can read in the news, an article about thousands dying and think nothing of it, and then you see a single man die in a terrible way and find it to be the most horrendous thing you've ever seen."