So I know I haven't posted anything for a while. My writer's block is still going on strong, but I managed to get an Idea, involving my internet persona. Of course, it's kinda awkward that the creepypasta villain will have my name "Havoc" and simillar descriptions to my profile picture. I have no other ideas, and my previous idea of a possible lost episode faded. So I'm gonna give this attempt a try; maybe something will come out of it.
I did not end up going hunting with my uncle, or going to comic-con with my cousin sadly. Things came up and they just couldn't go. My cousin couldn't afford tickets, Something came up at work for my uncle, etc.
I've grown a lot closer to some friends online, and frankly... I forgot how we even got this close... I mean the first time we ever met, we were complete strangers acting really weird, and next thing you know, we instantly know everything about each other, and trust each other completely... Now, I know what you're thinking "how can you trust someone across the internet with so much information, they could be lunatics" but these guys are just plain awesome. They make my day instantly better, no matter what I've been through.
It's like a daily ritual... we talk almost every day, be it jokes, life, games, anime, shows, etc. I've grown really close to these people, we've skyped, we know how everyone in the group looks like, and we've become so close that it's kinda odd how I trust them more than anyone actually here. I'm really glad I met them, and they're like family. Kinda odd to think about complete strangers from across the world as family, but when you get this close; it's an amazing relationship.
I'm not sure if I've mentioned before, but I've hit a stage where nothing bothers me anymore. There are a few things that changed, some that I'd rather not mention as they could be embarassing; and some people from my school know my account, and it isn't exactly safe to blog all my thoughts anymore... However, I've changed in a sense where I don't care about anything anymore. School work is no important matter, insults don't offend, ass holes waste their time trying to get to me, and I just walk around blandly without a single fuck to give.
It feels awesome to be honest, but it also has its downsides. I've also become braver in a sense where I can say whatever the hell I want without fear of being silenced by the rude people in my class anymore. Keep in mind, I'd always been put down in school by others, so for me; it's a pretty big achievement. However, people mistake this sudden change to be resistant and rebellious.
They claim I think I am above everybody, and pay no mind to rules or activities I need to follow. As you can tell... I don't give a crap about what they say either... However, I'd like to clarify, and say that it isn't true. I'm just less likely to be offended by rudeness or mistreatment; and I'll most likely stand up for myself now.
I still have a lazy attitude though, I'm not proud of it, but it continues to grow into my very being. I feel like I'm time's bitch right now... I don't claim I have it bad just yet, as college students and other time consumed people are worse off... I mean I've got tons of stuff to do, and many places to be at one time... not to mention that my parents are enforcing the fact that I have to sleep early, since I wake up at five every morning to go to swimming practice (WHICH IS A HUGE PAIN)
Then when I finally get home from tutoring and my mom driving around doing things, what little left of my personal time is taken up by homework or passing out in exhaustion. I'm becoming a damn sloth, I'm falling asleep in class too; and leaving everything to the last minute because I just cant stay awake or much less move from a couch or bed. I'm basically a walking zombie... If I don't fix this; It'll probably get worse when things get serious like heading to college and managing for my own.
I still have these weird moods and inexplicably weird dreams. Still beyond my understanding; I've even tried researching what it could be, but it all just leads to some bull crap on WebMD. Parents say it's hormones... testosterone... etc.
I want to say otherwise, but at the moment... it's really all the answers I've got at the moment. Anyways, with that update put aside; you can expect at least one creepypasta from me soon, and hopefully it actually is good. I do have to admit that my recent one "A month of rain" probably had good potential, but it was written in the peak of my writer's block... so it was hastily written and not enough thought was put into it... it's kinda crappy... My aunt says it's really good, but I think she's just sugar coating it... I'll try to do better with my newest one and take my time...
That's all for now -Havoc