"Don't criticize my pasta, it's only my first!"
"I spent over 5 hours on this story, don't judge it!"
We admins don't freaking care. Your story is not entitled to endless praise just because it's your first (or second), if it was rushed, or because you spent a long time on it (spending a long time writing a story is NOT a guarantee that it will be good.) If it's bad, then it's bad and no amount of special pleading will change that. If you didn't want criticism, you shouldn't have put it on a literature site.
Okay, rant over.
EDIT: from FantasyPhantom:
"If anything... the "don't criticize" shouldn't be in there in the first place. A proper writer would want feedback on their recent story. It helps people develop writing skills and learning to take input from others. The fact they don't want that isn't just that they aren't growing as writer while also putting up a metaphorical wall against the community. That's pathetic."
Truer words were never spoken.
EDIT2: Stop saying "don't edit my pasta!", "no one can edit my stories but me!!1" or worse yet, "if you see any errors, tell ME and don't edit it!" As an admin, it's my JOB to edit mistakes, and I often find ones the author missed. Stop telling the admins how to do their jobs and get off your high horse!
EDIT3: I've noticed that there's a trend of people saying "like my story or my totally awesome OC/a famous pasta monster will kill you!" Someone even emailed me and left a message on my Talk page saying "MY OC WILL KILL YOU NEXT!" when I deleted his story. Firstly, using fictional characters to threaten people is absolutely stupid. Secondly, it makes you look like a petty, vindictive asshole who treats any kind of criticism or rules like Dracula treats crucifixes. Thirdly, Argumentum ad Baculum anyone?
TL;DR: Don't whine about your story being criticized, deleted, flagged, or edited for mistakes. This includes pastas you didn't write, but copied from elsewhere and added to the wiki.