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Since many people ask me on an almost weekly basis as to how I write stories like I Won't Leave You and Just a "Nightmare", wondering how exactly I manage to pull off such "effective" stories, on a written and emotional level. I guess the story I'll be sharing today will also explain why my pastas are more emotional packed as well. And for me, I can say that one of the key factors is that I write in a quiet enviroment. Nothing much goes on around the street I live in. With only the gentle breezing of my surrounding fans being my music, unless I wander around YouTube to listen to some rock or metal sound, it is rather relaxing. But I'll get on with the story, since that will be the focal point here. It'll be a lengthy read, but to understand my pastas and me personally as well, I recommend you to read it.
Growing up for me was a rather easy life, actually. I started playing games at an early age, my parents got along well throughout most of their relationship with only a few bickering. During my elementary school years, what I lack in friends in school I had at home. You see, my mother used to run a daycare and I would help watch over them - and play games and with toys with them of course. We also had an interest in gaming, usually playing Super Smash Bros. or Gauntlet on the GameCube, sometimes I had a chance to sneak in a shooter as well.
I guess the first run in I had with a tragic event unfolding around me was my best friend's father passed away when we were around seven or so (we both were about the same age). I didn't understand what death was outside of gaming, but when I found out soon enough that he was gone from my life forever, I took it hard a bit, since I was over his house every other weekend or so. This put a small strain on my relationship with my friend, since his step-dad didn't really like me too much. But things got better again during my middle school years. Again, I was never popular in school, but I got a small circle of friends for whom I bought an Xbox 360 to play with.
I know I am jumping around the place a bit, and I realize that since these are just random events leading up to a rather life-changing one, but this can't go unsaid. I was always closer with my father. Not that I ever resented my mother or anything - I always loved my parents - but I did more with him. My mother told me this one day. I was never really sure why or what reason to, since she wasn't angry or anything, but those words still haunt me to this day.
In late 2009, around October or November or so, my mother was diagnosed with cancer. I...didn't really know how to take this during that time, as we were never told what kind of cancer it was specifically, and the doctors kept trying to figure it out. And ultimately, they never did. In March of 2010, when I was 15, I lost my mother.
My father was struggling with unemployment a year before, as the place he worked at had laid him off when they were being relocated to North Carolina. Because of family and friends living here, in Massachusetts, that would be a pretty dumb move to give all that up. So for the rest of 2010 and early 2011, we struggled a bit and eventually we couldn't afford the house we lived in anymore, as you might assume. Luckily, my father saw interest in another woman, who also had a daughter. I was alright with this, realizing that we all had our ways of coping and we can't always just mope around. I was mostly resilient and kept my feelings inside. Sometimes it showed. When she passed away, I took a week off of school, having to go to the wake anyways. Sometimes I thought about suicide and had considered it, but I never attempted to do so.
But the problem was that the woman he saw lived quite a distance from our friends and family, which of course created problems of seeing them, since I lack a lisense as it stands right now. I do at times get ridiculed for owning an Xbox and not the surperior PS3 or spending time playing PC games, but I do not regret my descion of buying one, which will probably be why I'll get an Xbox One when it comes out so I can still talk with my friends. The ones I have here, they're good to have, but none of them ever seem to want to get close with me as the ones I had, treating me more of an aquaintence than anything. My father works from 3PM to 11, his girlfriend from 10 to 6 and her daughter is usually at her father's house or otherwise not here.
In other words, if you ever see me write a creepypasta or so, just keep in mind that I'm usually doing so housebound, with no friends, family or anybody around me whatsoever. Alone.