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Dear Sony (Take 2)

Dorkpool December 15, 2014 User blog:Dorkpool

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Dear Sony,

Well, this is awkward.

If you remember my previous letter to you, I said, "Fuck you" multiple times. I was angry, and understandably so. You planned on making an animated comedy film based on my favorite superhero, Spider-Man, rather than having him be part of the Avengers. However, new plans you had have come to light, such as doing an adaptation of one of my favorite Spider-Man stories, "Kraven's Last Hunt".

Now, I should also note that Marvel's plans have come to light too. If they were to make a Spider-Man movie, they'd introduce the character in Captain America: Civil War, and have solo movies. These movies are supposed to follow a teenage Spider-Man, not rehash the origin, and have less romance. Marvel's plan is to get back to the root of the character: a teenage superhero. And that's great! Except that, as a teenager, I can honestly say that romance (or rather what teenagers call romance, and what adults call "being horny") is a pretty big thing. Though I will admit, it has been a tad overplayed in the Spider-Man movies.

So, Marvel has cool plans. And you, Sony, have a pretty cool plan, and a unique one for the Spider-Man movies: adult Spidey. So, kudos to that. And I am a bit curious about a "Kraven's Last Hunt" adaptation. There is one thing though: I'm not sure how well that story arc will work as a movie.

First off, it's a very psychological tale. It's filled with thought panels, where we get to understand most of the characters. Now, this works pretty well in comics, but as a movie, I'm not sure if that would work. Almost non-stop voice overs are not prevalent in many movies, and for good reason.

Second, a big part of the story comes from a character named Vermin. He's a character both Spider-Man and Captain America needed to work together to defeat, and that's why Kraven goes after Vermin: Kraven wants to prove himself to be a superior Spider-Man (no, not the Doc Ock one), and thus better than his foe. Kraven thinks that if he can take down a villain it took both Spidey and Cap to defeat, he will have proven himself Spider-Man's better. Which is all fine and dnady in the comics. But since you guys don't own the rights to Captain America, or really any other superheroes, you might have a problem there.

Finally, there's more than a bit of back story for that story arc. Ned Leeds, who was thought to be the Hobgoblin for a while and is dead as of "Kraven's Last Hunt", is mentioned in the story a few times. Now, comic readers might know who he is, but new comers probably don't. And while Ned Leeds isn't an integral part of the story, his death is mentioned a few times: "Yesterday Ned Leeds. Today Joe Face. Tomorrow...Aunt May? Mary Jane? Me?" (Joe Face is a character whose backstory and such is addressed in the story) While it might work to take him out, it might feel like something's missing. Also, there's the fact that Spider-Man is clad in his black costume for this story. However, it's a cloth black costume he wears, not the alien symbiote one. Most readers will be a bit confused about that.

So, with these hurdles, can you guys make this work? Maybe. I was also wondering if Marvel might be able to make it work. They have the rights to Captain America, and could perhaps insert a fight with Spidey, Cap, and Vermin at some point, helping to set the stage for "Kraven's Last Hunt". But the thing is that "Kraven's Last Hunt" is a very dark story, and most of Marvel's stuff isn't. So having a Spider-Man movie, especially his first, based on this story would be quite a tone shift, especially for a character considered somewhat light-hearted.

Anyway, my point here is that while I'm not entirely apologetic about my multiple "Fuck you"s, I am curious about a movie adaptation of "Kraven's Last Hunt" as long as you don't fuck it up. If you do...

  • ahem*

Fuck. You. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you.

Sincerely,

Dorkpool

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