Dear Marvel Comics,

Do you guys have a thing against immortal characters? First you kill of Wolverine. Then you plan to kill off Deadpool.

That being said, everyone knows these characters aren't going to stay dead, since 1) comic book death is never permenant 2) Wolverine is pretty popular, and is in every X-Men movie and 3) Deadpool is getting his own movie (finally and thankfully). So they're going to be back.

But the bigger question here is why. Why are you killing off these characters? Did they say mean things about your grandma? Because she's probably dead, you know. Did you and these characters have an online flame war? Seriously, explain this to me.

Or is it the much more likely and somewhat annoying and pathetic answer: killing off these characters will increase sales for the final issue and inevitable return, since the fans want them to come back.

But even if that is the logic behind these deaths, you might be losing money by having these titles cancelled. Well, maybe you can tell some stories about Deadpool after he died, since he had a thing with Death, and it might be interesting to see her reaction to Deadpool marrying a vampire succubus lady. But even then, you have a limited storytelling engine, limiting the stories you can tell.

Listen, Marvel, bubbula, I have respect for you...sort of. I'm still a bit annoyed about Superior Spider-Man, and what you did to the Spider-Man: Reign Spider-Man. The dude spent most of the story trying to get over his wife's death, and in Spider-Verse, his head is crushed with his wife's tombstone. Classy. Anyway, I still have respect for you, much more than I do DC comics. They decided to reboot their continuity, and you didn't. I respect that.

The point I'm making here is that I have some respect for you, but by killing these characters (well, Deadpool. I really don't give half a damn about Wolverine to be honest) I'm starting to lose it. I know you're bringing these guys back eventually, but why kill them in the first place? Why not just continue these characters stories? Deadpool has a wife and kid, and Wolverine lucrative movie deal? I'm not sure. Like I said, I really don't care much about Wolverine. Either way, these characters had stories going on, and more to tell. Killing them just limits those stories. Really, you're hurting yourself here.

So please, bring back these characters soon, and stop doing this sort of thing. It's just cheap.

Also, if you decide to replace Deadpool with a fellow called Dorkpool, and don't pay me royalties, I will be pissed.


Dorkpool (also known as the guy you might be paying royalties to)