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A Title Implying That The First Spider-Man Movie Wasn't Perfect

Dorkpool November 6, 2014 User blog:Dorkpool

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I know what you're thinking. "Wow, that's a long title. Is this a new Fall Out Boy song?" To answer your question, hypothetical reader, nope! This is me doing to the first Spider-Man movie what I did to The Amazing Spider-Man movies: dissecting differences from the comics.

I'll admit, I love the original Spider-Man movies (well, not the third one as much). But, since I criticized The Amazing Spider-Man movies, and Sykokillah (who comments on most of my posts. Thank you for that. It's nice to know someone gives a damn about what I write) said that the original Spider-Man movies weren't perfect, AND I enjoy doing this, I figured I might as well give it a shot.

1) Organic webbing. Spider-Man originally didn't have organic webbing, though after the movie, he did get it for a bit in the comics until One More Day came around and made Spider-Man fans want to murder Joe Quesada. But ire at Spider-Man making a deal with the Marvel universe's iteration of Satan isn't the point; the point is that originally, Spider-Man has mechanical webshooters. Now, I'll admit, I'm not the biggest fan of the organic webbing. But I do know the reasoning behind it: Peter Parker is supposed to be the superhero people relate to. When someone is able to design an adhesive even 4H corporations can't, it creates a problem when it comes to relatability. Also, there's the fact that Peter got wall crawling, proportionate strength, and spider-sense, so why not webbing? I should note that in the screenplay for the first Spider-Man movie, he couldn't actually aim the webbing. So, he designed webshooters so he could aim the webbing and use it. This would have been a smart compromise, and I wish they went with it. Oh well...

2) "Teary" Maguire: Yes, I know. Tobey Maguire Spidey is a bit of a crybaby, I'll admit. But, in all defense, he does make a good Peter Parker. I personally think that Maguire is a good Peter, and Andrew Garfield is a good Spider-Man. I'll explain the Andrew Garfield thing a bit more in number 3.

3) Spider-Man's wit. "It's you that's out, Gobby. Out of your mind." A quote from Spider-Man. Oh, that line. Spider-Man is well known for being the smartass of the Marvel universe, matching punches with puns. But oh dear lord, that line. The first Spider-Man movie did not make Spidey out as a smartass. I will give kudos to The Amazing Spider-Man for having a smartass Spidey.

4) The Green Goblin. First, I'll address the costume. A lot of people bitched about this. I personally don't hate it, but it isn't perfect. I know why they went that route, since the comic costume would look pretty pathetic and funny in live action. Second, let's talk about Normy's Golluming, as he talks to himself in the mirror multiple times. While not terrible, it's still not perfect. And this line: "We'll meet again, Spider-Man!" Dear lord what a dumbass line. The Green Goblin is one of Spider-Man's most well known and deadly villains. A line like that makes him out to be a pretty cliche villain. Ugh.

5) Mary Jane. Mary Jane is always getting kidnapped by some villian and saved by Spider-Man. She is the epitome of "damsel in distress" in these movies, which is kind of annoying. Way to go in making strong female characters, guys! 

While I like this movie, I will admit that it is flawed in some ways. But, to be honest, it's still a good Spider-Man movie. Despite getting some things wrong, it got quite a bit right. Which is not quite something I can say for The Amazing Spider-Man.

Anyway, the point of all this is that not all long titles aren't Fall Out Boy songs.

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