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Torn to Purgatory

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Mommy, your warmth from within is the true meaning of home.

Mommy, I can't wait to see you with my eyes I have yet to develop; to take in your scent with my nose and lungs; to feel your soft kisses on my skin.

Mommy, why are you crying? Are they tears of joy that I will be there soon?

Mommy, your voice sounds so pretty. Promise that you'll sing to me when you cradle me in your arms. My ears are still growing, but I'm sure when I'm born, you'll sound even better than the muffles I currently hear.

Mommy, I hear you talking. You sound angry. Something is drumming violently on your tummy! It causes me to churn and twist. I don't feel safe here anymore!

Mommy, the drumming is gone, but I still feel your anger. What's going on in the outside world? I'm so scared to go out there now, but I know you'll keep me safe, right?

Mommy, I love you so much. I love your sounds; the humming of your blood rushing through your veins; the steady beating of your heart in sync with mine.

Mommy, something's coming for me! It's cold and hard. Don't let it take me!

Mommy! Why does it hurt? What is this? Ow! Mommy! It's taken my leg!

Mommy, please! Help me! My other leg is gone, too! I feel these strange objects grabbing snipping off my arms now. They hurt, mommy!

Mommy... I can't feel my heart. My head no longer feels attached to anything. I'm being pulled out of you much too soon.

Mommy? It's dark and cold now. I can't hear you anymore. It's so quiet. Where have I been taken to?

Mommy? Where are you? Who is this beautiful being in front of me?

He has light shining from all around him. He says that I lost my chance to live – to enter heaven. He claims this darkness to be something called “Purgatory”. What is that, mommy?

Mommy, I'm all alone now. I can't feel myself; I can't feel you; I can't smell or hear or taste anything. The beautiful being is gone. He's been gone a long time. How long have I been here? Why can't I leave? There's no one here to talk to. I can't even talk to you, so why do I continue to try?

Mommy, what did you do? What did I do? Was I not good enough to make you love me? Are you hurt? Did something bad happen to you?

Mommy, I just exist. Somewhere, I exist. For what? I want to disappear. There's little for me to think about. I didn't get the chance to explore the world so I could fuel my wonder! I'm all alone. This emptiness around me is all that I have. Forever.

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