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The Tale of King Ramses

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Courage 93fc0e 1040198

Courage the Cowardly Dog was a show on Cartoon Network when it actually had mostly good shows (It aired from 1999-2002). It was cancelled after 4 seasons but it's shown on Cartoon Network sporadically.

One episode in particular that scared a lot of us was King Ramses' Curse. But does anyone really know King Ramses' backstory? Not really. That's where I come in. About 3 weeks ago, a friend of mine named Ted sent me a link to a website. It was the Cartoon Network website but there was something off about it.

It was darker than I had last remembered it, and by that I mean dark colors. It had been a while since I'd been on the site, so I figured they remodeled or something. There was a Courage the Cowardly Dog section of the website. I went to it, as it was my favorite show on Cartoon Network even though it scared the ever-living shit out of me sometimes. One part of the section was "learn the real story of King Ramses". I thought it was some history section of the actual King Ramses. Being a history buff, I clicked on it expecting to learn about King Ramesses, or Ramses as he's called sometimes. I was wrong.

It started out like any other history bio, but when it got to Ramses' death however, that's where it took a turn for the worse. The website stated that Ramses, while alive, slaughtered a million enemies in battle. But when he returned to Egypt, one of the families of his enemies were waiting for him.

They beat him with sticks, and then bound him in thorns, the same as what Jesus' crown was made of as he was traveling to Calvary to be crucified. He was taken to what was Persia and the trip there itself was brutal. He was bound by his feet and hands. Tied to two donkeys, he had no protection from the sun as he was naked as well. He wasn't fed very much, so when he got to Persia he had lost half his weight already. But that's when the true torture began.

The only mercy his captors granted him was clothing him in a green robe. First, they took a prickly plant, and whacked him with it repeatedly. The spines of the plant stuck in him, and were barbed. Ramses' captors plucked them out with great care to cause as much pain as possible. Next, they took rusty knives and ran them over each of his limbs as carefully as possible as to only cut skin deep. Then they removed his skin. However, Ramses was still alive. His captors then made him eat his own skin as to cause the once great King humiliation.

He refused. Subsequently his captors broke both of his elbows. After he had eaten his skin, the captors scraped what meat was left on his head. They painted his skull an orange color for unknown reasons. And then after all that, they continued torturing him. While he was alive, they cut into his body. They removed his intestines, showed them to him and then fed them to wild dogs.

Then they removed his stomach, showed it to him, then they threw it into a fire. They did this with each organ, alternating between dogs and fire. Then they got to his heart, Ramses was just barely alive. Before the captors left Egypt, they had taken Ramses' prized possession: a slab. Not just any slab... this slab was magical.

It had a picture of water, a strange device Ramses had seen in a dream, and locusts. The slab also had a picture of Ramses on it. The Persians had taken the slab to further upset Ramses. But they were unaware of one thing: Ramses had power over the slab, and with his dying breath, he cursed the slab. The second after he died, the slab's picture of him changed to a frightening mummy. The Persians were frightened by this, but thought it was just a trick.

They returned the body and slab to the Egyptians, but they themselves found themselves in a bit of a nightmare of their own. For nights after they killed Ramses and returned his body/slab, they experienced nightmares of the King. Orange skull, elbows twisting at unnatural angles, and the voice of a demon. Most never woke up from these nightmares, and the ones who did committed suicide. Nobody else experienced King Ramses' wrath again for a while until the 1940's.

Timeline of King Ramses incidents:

3750 BC

10 Persian nobles died while sleeping, another 10 committed suicide

1942

Hitler's Afrika Corps uncovers the tomb of Ramses. One battalion goes missing after making contact with King Ramses after General Rommel removed the slab from his crypt. Rommel realized that this all happened when he took Ramses' slab so he returned it to his tomb.

January 19th, 1957

An Italian archeologist uncovered the tomb; he removed the slab from the tomb of King Ramses. As he was leaving he triggered a booby trap. He was trapped inside the tomb, while King Ramses himself appeared before him. He summoned locusts which ate the man to the bone, killing him. The locusts then picked up the slab and carried it to the tomb.

1999

Two grave robbers steal the slab and escape the authorities in Egypt. When they returned to the United States, they were chased by the FBI. They buried the slab on a farm in Nowhere, Kansas. King Ramses appeared as they attempted to flee the farm, then killed them after they refused to return the slab. Later, a purple dog named Courage uncovered the slab. His owner Eustace threw it out after thinking it was garbage.

Later he took it back after learning how much money it is worth. King Ramses returned and his three drawings became plagues upon the Bagge farm. First the house flooded. Then horrible music played. Next Locusts descended upon the house, eating it whole. Eustace had a change of heart and let Courage give the slab back. However, Eustace changed his mind again, and went after it. King Ramses' locusts killed him and the slab was returned to Egypt.

After I read that, I suddenly had a bit of sympathy for Ramses whenever I watched the episode, but something strange also happened. Parents who read it as well demanded that Cartoon Network take down the link, which they did. I don't remember the website so I may never get to see it again.

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