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The Returning Dream

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Author's note: Before you read, just know that this is an actual dream that I've had on several rare occasions. It's come to me since I was a little girl, and I've had this dream since. I had recently experienced it again about 4 to 5 weeks ago, and I can't get it out of my mind lately. Why it comes to me, I'll never know.

It just kind of starts. There is no beginning. No introductions of any sort. And there is no sound, not even of my own breathing. I know it's the same dream all over again, because it just starts this way. It's always the same.

I'm just standing there, in a large forest. There is shrubbery, trees, and all sorts of branches within my view, but I'm kind of just standing in one part that is empty. A large, vacant lot; smack dab in the middle of the woods. It's incredibly muggy, and the air is filled with fog. Everything seems to be It's not easy to describe. However, despite the dreary atmosphere, it's still quite calming. I still hear nothing, but it doesn't seem to really bother me. 

For some reason, I don't feel in control. I'm just standing there like some kind of mindless vegetable. For whatever reason, I turn around, and there she is. A beautiful, young girl with long dirty blonde hair cascading down her back. Her eyes are dark blue, and incredibly lovely. Her peachy skin doesn't quite fit in with the blue tinted scenery, nor does her pretty, rosy smile. She's much younger than me, maybe 12 years old? I'm 20 years old now, but I've never known how old I am in this dream, seeing as how I've had it for many years, but I never even see a reflection of myself. Anyways, she's pretty much just a lovely girl, in jeans, and a white long sleeved T-shirt, staring at me as if she's waiting.

She smiles, and giggles, but like I've said before, I can hear nothing. I only see her slight laughter as she excitedly rushes to me, and grabs my hand. We're suddenly both running out of the vacant lot, and into the woods. My vision begins to grow blurry, and instead of silence, I can hear a low humming sound. I feel no emotion as we run. The girl keeps turning back at me, pulling my hand, and smiling. Every time she smiles, I somehow feel warmth in my feels so nice.

We keep running, until we reach another lot. This one isn't empty though. There is a large house occupying the center, which looks incredibly old, but very well kept. I'd say it's a house from the early 1900's or so. Even though the surroundings are still tinted blue, I can make out the color of the paint that covers the home. The body is clothed in a pale beige color, and the shutters, trimmings, and other accents are egg shell white. Every window seems to be covered from the inside by dark colored, satin drapes. There are trees planted around it that seem to be foreign in origin, as well as flowers. The grass surrounding the area is bright green, and full of life.

The beautiful girl holding my hand leads me to the back yard. As we pass the side of the house, I look down to see that there are stepping stones leading to a small garden. The garden is next to an old barn like shed, housing a rusted, and aged vintage Ford truck. It's obvious that the paint color was originally red; almost like a copper tinted red. However, the paint is almost completely chipped, and decayed, so the truck is obviously dead as a doornail. Possibly hasn't been touched in ages.

I think that she is taking me to the garden (which is filled with gorgeous purple, and white pansies that are overpowering the blue tinted coloring). But no, this isn't our destination. She leads me next to the old barn. As we pass it, I can't take my eyes off of that dead, Ford truck. I've never discovered why, but it's ominous to me. 

She sits down on her knees and motions to me, with her hands, to join her. Her gorgeous smile never fades, nor does the low humming sound that I have continuously heard. She starts digging into the dirt with her lovely fingers, and without any control over myself, I begin to do the same. We keep digging, until my fingers hit an old box. Yet again, something else that's vintage. An old shoe box (blank, there is no brand label printed on it). We both stare at the box, as she reaches over me, and takes the lid off. I expect something horrific to be there (Because the dream is always so...weird) but it's actually a stack of photos. Photos from the late 1800's to now. Each photo had a family standing in front of the exact same house behind us. The last name of each family is printed on the back of every photo, but I never remember them.

I go through these photos for a long time, and the humming sound begins to fade away. By this point, I realize that I can hear my surroundings again. The faint sound of bugs, my breathing, and a toad croaking next to a babbling brook, somewhere in the distance. I turn to look at the girl who has lead me here, and she just looks back at me; no smile stretched on her face this time. 

She looks so blank. No emotion, and I feel somber looking at her. She motions once more to follow her, and I do. She skips across the stepping stones, as if she's happy, but her face remains the same. I don't really skip across the stones, I just continue to walk. 

As we reach the front door, she doesn't turn to face me. She gently opens the door, and leads me inside of the house. I gaze at my current surroundings, amazed at the lovely home that is stretched around me. Gorgeous, cherry wood stairs, and flooring. The furniture is so old, and Victorian, but beautifully kept, and dusted. The entire house smells like it's been recently cleaned with bleach, but covered by heavy incense that smell like burning pine. This gives me a warm feeling, because burning pine is one of my favorite scents. 

I actually begin to feel a little bit of emotion walking through this large, beautiful home. However, I have never remembered the emotions I have felt during this part of the dream. 

We continue through the halls, and make our way to the living room. At this point she turns to me, and just stares into my eyes. We keep eye contact for a long time, and never say a word. The blue tint from before goes darker, and the low humming sound comes back. Yet, I never take my eyes away from hers. At least, not until we hear a thud from upstairs. At this point, I whip my head back, and look towards the stairs. We both hault our breathe, and hear the sound of a door knob turning. It echos through the entire house, and the only other thing you can hear is that low, and drawn out humming noise. 

Suddenly, I hear a door open upstairs, and slow and uneven foot steps. The blonde girl dashes for the front door, wearing a face of fear. I take this as a hint that I shouldn't stick around, and bolt after her. As she's heading out of the front door, the steps seem to be making it down the stairs. I don't turn to see what's heading down, but I continue staring at the girl as she runs. She makes one last pleading look at me before she runs out the door. I follow after her and run to the front of the yard, gasping for breathe. I'm bent over, clutching onto my knees, breathing hard and gazing at the dead grass on the ground. Dead grass. I remember the grass being luxurious and green when we came here. 

At this point, I stand up tall, and I realize that the girl is no longer with me. She isn't anywhere to be found. I slowly turn and look at the house, and am surprised by what I see.

It's the same house...but it's not beige and egg shell white anymore. It's just...decayed. It looks like there IS some kind of paint on it, but for the most part, it's chipped off, and practically gone. The windows are busted in, and boarded over. All of the gorgeous trees, and flowers that were planted before are long since gone. There is a smell of stormy weather, and decay in the air. I notice that the large barn that stood tall in the backyard is gone. The truck is still there, but no longer housed by anything. 

I gaze at this dead house for an incredibly long time. At this point, I don't even know how to feel. The low humming stays for a while, but it dies once again. I sit on the cold, hard ground, and just keep staring. Now that I can hear the sound of nature again, I don't do anything else. Just watch and listen.

And this part of the dream is the worst...because as I sit there staring, and listening...I have never felt so alone in my entire life. Alone and empty.

And when I wake up from this one dream that returns every rare occasion, I can no longer sleep throughout the night.

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