Need I say more?
I'm a sucker for cat videos, cat photos, anything to do with cats. Cats acting silly, mad, crazy... even if they're just sleeping in a funny position.
It was during a wasted night spent gawking at cat videos that my life nearly ended. I can say with no reservations that I truly wish it had.
I was watching cat clips on YouTube, just whatever new stuff had been posted. Most of it wasn't really that interesting, but you don't find the gems without searching through the crap.
I found "Sad Kitten" through a comment on one of these videos.
"That's funny, but if you want to see something new and different check out Sad Kitten!"
There was a strange link, and I clicked it. An act now famous among bad decisions.
The video showed a small kitten with what looked like a sad face. Down-turned little mouth, hooded eyes that seemed to slant down like it was going to cry. It was a long-haired tabby... very plain and bland-looking, which only added to its depressing little personality.
It sat on a bare wooden floor and just stared at the camera. I would've thought it was a still image except for the random times its eyes would blink.
Then, the narrative started.
It was a cutesy, weak little voice someone had dubbed over the video, like a young woman trying to do an impression of a little boy.
"All my brothers and sisters got takened away 'n I was the only one nobody wanted."
I could actually feel a tear forming in the corner of my eye.
"I'm all alone and none of the olda cats will take care of me."
"I'm hungry but I don't know what ta eat a'cause I never learnded yet."
Tears were speeding down my cheeks now, over my chin, down my neck, I couldn't stop, and I couldn't explain it.
My clothes were drenched, and my hands were soaked as I kept wiping and wiping at my face, trying to hold myself together.
I finally broke eye contact with the sad kitten and rushed to the bathroom.
I looked in the mirror, desperately trying to figure out what was going on and what that strange video had done to me.
Tears were everywhere now and I couldn't stop them no matter how hard I tried.
The sink filled with blood.
So many tears. Tears exposing muscle and bone. My eyes and my skin just kept tearing in spreading fractals until my face was a torn mess.
All I could do as I collapsed to the floor was hope and pray that kitten found a home.