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Nightmares and Dreamscapes

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Last thing I always see before I wake up is the deaths of all those around me, a testament to the monster I know I have within myself.

My name is unimportant, as I am not here looking for fame, fortune, or anything of the sort. I guess this is something that I need to get off my chest and share, so that maybe what I see every night can no longer haunt me.

Since I was thirteen, the same nightmare has been coming into my subconscious, the only real detail that is always constantly changing is the person. One night it'll be my mother, the next my father, the one after that my best friend, three days from that my girlfriend.

It always starts in the woods, the sun setting and darkness on the horizon, the last rays of the sun through the trees paint the forest a bright red. It is at this point that the person is found running through the woods, for instance, my girlfriend. Running, and panting heavily, the fear is evident in her eyes, as she is being pursued by something in the distance behind her. It is the general thought in my head as I ponder on it now that she is attempting to reach somewhere with the few last spots of sunlight left on the earth, possibly a car or a house.

However, the darkness quickly shadows into the forest and absolute night surrounds her. She attempts to slow her breathing down, trying to control her rapidly rising heartbeat to no avail. Crunching of vines and branches sound from all around her as the fear swells to unbearable amounts, nearly causing her to cry out but before the sound escapes her, she covers her mouth fearing the unknown entity will locate her with deadly precision should she allow the fear to take grip of her. It is usually at this point in time, I begin to search for a way to help her only to find that my sight changes from her to the eyes of the pursuer.

Following the unmistakable scent of the girl being chased into the multitude of trees, the pursuer knows it is drawing nearer and nearer, the fear from the girl a beacon to the entity as it finally reaches its prey. Fighting the urge to take her outright, it watches from a distance as she tries to hide and calm herself, not knowing the time for such things has passed. Slowly and with skilled precision, the predator takes down his prey.

Switching back to the scene above, I am watching as whatever this fucking thing is attacks my girlfriend. She tries to fight, to kick, punch, bite, scratch, scream and cry, trying to escape the clutches but the creature is too strong and binds her in place.

I return back to the eyes of the creature looking down at my girlfriend, the fear in her face changing to one of mortal terror. The feeling of seeing this fills the thing with a sick pleasure. Anger quickly fills me, knowing only that I am a spectator and not being able to help my love, my girlfriend. Tears stream down her face, and she looks directly into its eyes, staring into mine as well. She utters a single phrase, but one that chills me to the bone.

"I love you."

I am once again behind the eyes of the entity, feeling the soft skin of her throat in the rough hands of the creature I'm looking through. She begins to choke, trying to preserve the last bouts of breath, a look in her eyes catches its attention as she believes that something will stop this from happening. A sickening chuckle erupts from the thing's mouth, followed by a deep, menacing voice.

"There is no hope for you. What you're looking for is long gone, and only this remains. Be happy that the last sights of your life are what is in front of you, and leave the past behind you."

It grips tighter, and she's struggling to keep her breath, but slowly is losing the hope she once had into an expression of nothingness. The life begins to fade, the bright, icy blue eyes of my girlfriend fade to a dull grey at first as she takes her last breath, and finally a deep black as it fully drains from her body completely.

It is then that I return to the overhead view of the creature. An overwhelming feeling of rage and hate overcomes me, a feeling of murderous intent, and the feeling of loss. It removes itself from atop her body and crosses her hands over her chest and closes her eyelids to make it seem as if she is just resting. Then, it leans over her body and does something that astounds me. It lays the lightest and smallest of kisses upon her lips, feeling the coldness of death that has already began to take her into its embrace. The creature rises to its feet and my view shifts to see the creature face to face.

"Finally, I can see this fucking thing, and hunt it down... I'm going to..." My thoughts from within my dream suddenly stop as if I had been hit with a ton of bricks. What I'm seeing cannot be truth, cannot be real, cannot be happening.

What is staring back at me into the dark of the woods, over the body of my girlfriend... is me.

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