Hank had been drinking on his front porch all night, until the thing crept out of the woods. At first he thought it was some weird looking deer, the animal being distorted by his bad eyesight and the state of being drunk. He had never seen a deer with such a big head or walking around on just two legs. So he went back to drinking, watching the thing pace the tree line.
It wasn't until the thing started jumping at something in the trees that Hank thought that maybe he was seeing something other than a deer. His buddy Jeb had said he had seen aliens a few mornings back when he was out hunting.
Jeb had described the little guys as small and green. This thing was neither small nor green. From where Hank sat, it looked like it was half the size of some of the shorter trees; also this thing looked white. If this was an alien, Hank was going to kill it and get tons of cash for his find.
With gun in hand, Hank started walking the field from his house to the tree line. As he got closer, he could see this really was no deer. It was still jumping—eating bats or birds coming out of the trees. With each jump it would open its mouth, which spanned the length of its massive, egg-shaped head.
The head sat atop an impossibly thin neck. It had no front legs or arms; just two legs, and it stood upright. Hank stopped when the thing was fifty feet from him. He didn't want to alert it in any way, so he raised his rifle and slowly pulled the bolt back, the cold metal making the slightest sound that was hidden by the thumps of the creature's landing. Lining up the shot, he fired.
In Hank's drunken state the bullet found home in a tree about ten feet from the thing. The egg-headed creature knew he was there now. It slowly turned its eyeless head towards him and started its awkward stride in Hank's direction. The thing walked like a large bird, but Hank wasn't going to take the time to study it. Quickly he loaded another shell and shot from the hip. The bullet whizzed into the forest.
The egg headed creature opened its mouth and broke into an awkward jog. The ground shook under Hank's feet and he turned to run towards his house, his heart pounding in sync with his feet hitting the ground. He could feel the thick hot air of the thing breathing down his neck. The sound of its mouth snapping shut behind him buzzed in his ears.
Suddenly, Hank was in the air and quickly finding himself landing hard on the ground, knocking the wind from his lungs. Before he had a chance to turn over, something grasped his side and turned him onto his back. His gun lost in the fall he could just lay there helplessly. Now the large monster stood over him. Looking at him with its eyeless head, it slowly lifted one of its legs into the air, and put its large, frog like foot down on Hank's chest.
Hank, frozen with fear, could only look on, taking in the thing as it was taking him in. Its legs about as thick as its neck, it had a potbelly and its ribs could be made out on its armless upper half. A line of thick hair trailed from its lower jaw right down the middle of the beast; other than that, the thing had no other features.
No genitals, no texture to its pale white flesh. Slowly, it opened its massive mouth, exposing an impressive length of slimy black flesh. Its long red tongue poked and prodded at his body. Its breath seemed calming and warm; like a hug. It made Hank relax, relieving himself as the egg-headed thing started to rip him apart.