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Preface

I love my brother...

I love my brother...



If you were to loose that most important person, what would you do to get them back? I love my brother, love him more than anything in the world. And I'll do ANYTHING for him, no matter what it takes.



---

My Angel

My Angel-

My Angel-

My very first memory was waking to the face of an Angel...

I think I was normal once. I might have had friends, went to slumber parties, that stuff. But I don't remember. I don't miss it though. You can't miss something you don't remember having after all. I don't want to be normal, not anymore. That means I'd have to deal with those people. I'd have to make friends and go to their houses. The mere idea scares me. I don't like people, I just don't know how to deal with them. They just don't compare, no matter how hard I try to relate. There's only one person I understand, one person that understands me.

My big brother is normal. But he's still amazing. I wish I could be just like him. He's top of each class, going for Valedictorian, even though he skipped a grade. Everyone likes him, he just knows how to handle people. And he has lots of friends, from all sorts of groups. From populars to nerds. Everyone loves him, but I love him most. I used to be jealous, that so many people got to see how special he was, is. I wanted him all to myself. I was afraid he'd hate me when I told him, but he understood. He told me that they didn't get to see the real him. Only I did, that was why they got to call him his name, but only I got to call him brother. I get giddy whenever I remember that. It makes me happy that I am the only one that gets that part of him, the loving brother. After all, he's my special person, my angel, my first memory.

I was told it was a horrible accident that took my memories away. My parents always fought (so brother tells me). He says we spent long nights curled up together, listening to them scream and throw things. But one night it was worse than others. Brother said that both our parents came home late, drunk. It didn't take them long to start screaming at each other. It only got worse, and dad came storming into our room. Brother tried to stop him, but he dragged me out of the room. He left with me, taking the car. Brother hates telling this part of the story. I know he's afraid I'll remember something and get sad, but I never remember, and he's always relieved when I don't. He tells me that he begged mom to stop dad, but she was too busy "sobbing and feeling sorry for herself to get her sorry ass up and fix it". I think brother hates mom, but I don't blame him.

He said that the rest of the night was a blur. He kept yelling at mom, telling her to fix it. She never responded, never did anything. Brother was the one to answer the call the next morning. He said it was the worst call he ever got. It was the police. Dad had gotten into a wreck, drove us into the river. Dad died on impact. I don't know how I survived, but brother said that it was because "not even the powers that be would take something so wonderful from this world. Not when there are so few things that make this world worth the effort". I think he's best, but secretly it makes me happy that he thinks that I'm so special. That I'm the amazing one. It makes me feel worthy of him. And I can't help but believe it true, because brother never lies, not to me.

After the wreck, they took me home. Brother made mom get a private doctor, Doc. He wouldn't have me in that hospital. He said I was never the same, though. When I ask how so, he never answers. He gets this far away look in his eyes and gets really quiet. I think it's too painful to him, so I stopped asking. But he said there was one silver lining. The doc said that I would most likely forget. Brother said that he hoped I would. That way we could move on, that we could put it all behind us. Even if that means me forgetting him. He said it was for the best, that he could always make new and happier memories with me. I just had to get rid of all the other ones first. When I heard that, I wondered if it was my brother's desire that got me to do it. Because I did, I forgot everything.

I opened my eyes for the "first time" just last year. I didn't know where I was, or even who I was. But I did know that the eyes staring down at me belonged to an angel. They were so soft, so inviting. The rest of his face slowly came into focus, and yep, he was definitely an angel. No human can smile like that. I didn't want to offend him, but I had to know, who was he? It seemed that that was the perfect question to ask, because his smile grew warmer. I made the angel happy. He told me that his name was Trace, but to me, he was Brother. An angel for a brother, I couldn't believe it. He said that my name was Vladimir, but I liked being called Vladi. I giggled. It was a funny name. When I asked him where I was, he said that I was in our room, that it was safe there. I loved our room, especially because it was OURS. Even if it seemed a little creepy, what with the candles flickering the weird shadows on the walls. It was perfect. I remember just knowing everything else would be perfect to, it had to be. But it wasn't. Not when Brother was gone.

The next person I met was Doc. After Brother was sure I was okay, he brought Doc in to check on me. Doc freaked me out, but Brother trusted him, so I did too. Doc looked me over and wrote a bunch of stuff in a notebook, all the while he had this huge smile on his face. As if my mere existence amused him in some way. He was a person that took a while getting used to, but once you did, he was a funny guy. A little twisted in the head, and I can't help but wonder how he was allowed to become a doctor, but still funny. Somehow he fit right in, despite only having the occasional visit to "check up on his favorite patient". I think he likes to come over because we amuse him. But that's just speculation. The rest of the day, I spent it in the room, OUR room, just talking to my amazing Brother after Doc left. It was perfect.

The first time I "met" mom, was that night. But when she saw me, she started screaming and she wouldn't stop. Brother told me that I should go to bed, and I did without question. It didn't take long for the screaming to stop. Brother must have fixed whatever problem mom had, and I was giddy when Brother crawled into be with me. He snuggled me close and apologized, then asked if I said good night to the monster under the bed. When I asked him why, he said that monsters don't eat their friends, so if I'm nice, the monster wont eat me. I say good night to Frankie every night now. Though I'm pretty sure Brother only said that to distract me, no use risking it.

Mom never got better, despite whatever Brother said to her that night. She was fine if Brother was around, but when Brother was gone, she was mean. I dreaded when Brother went to school. He said I wasn't ready for people yet, so mom home schooled me. This only made mom bitter. She told me I should be dead, that I'm some sort of monster. I know it was no use convincing her otherwise, so I told her that monsters weren't so bad. After all, Frankie had more manners that her, and she was supposed to be my mom. She didn't like that. I should have kept my mouth shut.

She started turning on the lights, even though she knew it hurt my eyes. They've been sensitive since the accident, and I could only handle candle light. I couldn't do my work because of this, and she'd yell at me when I gave up. I started to hate her. I think Doc knew what was going on. He'd frown whenever he had to check my eyes. But he never said anything. It was how he did things. If we weren't brave enough to tell him what's wrong, he'll let us suffer until we do. He's twisted like that (How did he become a doctor again?), but I took it as a challenge. How long could I hold out? Not long apparently. It just started hurting too much.

I finally snapped and told Brother. I'd never seen him so scary before. His face- that must have been what the devil looked like. But he said he wasn't mad at me, would never be mad at me. Then he told me to go to bed. It was only seven, but I listened. I always listen.

There was yelling that night. I couldn't make out what they were saying but the male voice had to be my brother's, even if I hardly recognized it. How could such a demonic voice come out of an angel's mouth? But I wasn't scared, I was happy. All this, just to defend me? I could help but feel so loved. Mom's voice was pleading, like she was begging for something. Brother just laughed at her. Everything went quiet soon after. I tried to stay awake, waiting for Brother like I always did, but I had been feeling very weak those last few days. I haven't told Brother or Doc yet, I don't want to worry them. Especially after I complained about mom to Brother. He has enough on his plate. Still, I tried very hard to say awake by having a one sided conversation with Frankie. It only worked so long. I was just drifting off about an hour later, when Brother slipped into bed with me. I barely whispered a good night to him and Frankie before I was out.

After that, mom never even looked at me. She was very quiet, only saying the bare minimum and only when absolutely needed. She began to throw herself into her work and was hardly around. I liked her better that way, but I still wish that she just won't come home one day, that it'd be just my Brother and I. Even Doc, in all his creepy glory, was better than mom. He never tried to hurt me. And despite everything, I couldn't help but like him. Maybe Doc would take us in and we could all be a real family. A boy can dream. She had also enrolled me into public school. Doc said I was ready but, with a smile like that, I hardly believed him. Only an idiot would. Sadist. Really, why do I like him? Brother said that it'd be easy for me. He seemed much more honest than Doc, but he was wrong. It wasn't easy at all, and I learned something new about myself. People scared me. There were so many of them, all loud and annoying and filthy. I wanted to go home.

It didn't get better. It was like they could sense weakness, they KNEW I was afraid. They started to make fun of me about everything: my sun-glasses I had to wear, my below-average grades, my pale skin, and my lack of friends. But what hurt the most were the whispers from the teachers. How could my Brother, so perfect at everything, have such a disappointing sibling? It scared me the most. Was I not good enough for my Big Brother?

It didn't take long before Brother knew that something was wrong, and it took less time for him to get it out of me. I can't hide anything from him. That was the second time that I saw that demonic face. He said that I should never listen to them. That I was PERFECT, that I didn't need good grades. He'd always take care of me, so what's the point? I didn't need friends. I had him. We'd always be together, forever. I was his treasure, and none of them could change that. I was never happier than in that moment, when he said that. He told me it was okay to be scared of them, but I shouldn't let them know.

"Never let them know how you really feel, they'll only use it against you" he told me. I knew he was right, he always is. He slipped out that night when he thought I was sleeping. I don't know where he went or when he got back, but things changed afterwards. Everyone avoided me. They wouldn't utter my name, even in whispers. They left me alone, and I was happy. I don't know how he did it, but Brother fixed it again. He always does.

After that, my only problem was that I was becoming more and more weak. Soon, nothing looked good to eat, it all smelled wrong. My muscles started to lock up at random, and I was having troubles staying awake. I know that Doc knew. But I hadn't told him myself, so naturally he just sat back and watched me struggle. I'm pretty sure he thought it was funny. But then the rash came, and I knew I had to tell Brother and Doc. It wasn't like any rash I'd ever seen, and it REALLY hurt. I couldn't tough this one out. I had to tell. To my relief, they knew what was wrong with me. I knew they would. Though I think I should have been scared of the knowing smiles they exchanged. If it wasn't my Brother, I would have been.

Brother said he and Doc already had just the remedy, but it was secret, so he couldn't tell me. I didn't question why. Why would I? Brother knew best. And Doc's smile sorta told me that I didn't WANT to know. But Brother wouldn't do anything to harm me, so it had to be okay.

That night, I was called down to dinner in pitch darkness. Not a single candle was lit. Brother said that it was to keep the remedy secret, so I shrugged it off. The remedy turned out to be food. As soon as I tasted it, my appetite came back with vengeance. I dug into it, not bothering with eating utensils. I just ripped it apart with my teeth. It was amazing, so soft and chewy. Perfect. And the juices were moan-worthy. It was the best meal I ever had. If I wasn't so busy eating, I would have been surprised it was so good. Brother wasn't the best cook, after all.

The remedy worked almost instantly. When I woke up the next day, I felt brand new, just like what I first woke up. The rash was gone, I had more energy than I knew what to do with, and my appetite was back. Though nothing tasted as good as the remedy. Doc came by and confirmed that I was fine now. Brother said that it would be our new tradition. Once a month, we'd eat together in the dark. Well, I'd eat and he'd talk. It became the day I looked forward to most. But it was a bit odd, being the only one eating. I couldn't see him, but I still felt bad for eating in front of him. So once I even asked him to eat it with me. It took a little whining, but he caved. Not that he complained, he loved it as much as I did.

Now we eat together every time. It's my most special day with my most special person. I just don't see how life could get much better than it is right now.

"Vladi, dinner!"

"Coming, Brother!"

Got to go, we're having my favorite...

My Treasure

My Treasure-

My Treasure-

I will forever keep you safe. You are my treasure.

The night of the accident was the worst of my life. I tried to stop dad, when he took Vladi. The man was to strong though, I was only nine after all, and I couldn't stop him from leaving with my twin. Mom was useless, she just sobbed her eyes out like SHE was the only one suffering. I screamed at her to do something, but she wouldn't. She was weak, but I vowed I wouldn't lose my twin, my other half, over her stupidity. The next morning brought terror to my heart. It was the police. There was an accident, of course there was, dad was drunk! He drove into the river. Neither survived. Cause Of Death, drowning. I couldn't breathe, couldn't talk, couldn't even cry. It wasn't real after all. It couldn't be real.

It didn't hit home until the funeral. Seeing my twin, laying there, un-moving. It was to cruel. He never did anything to anyone! I shattered on the inside. It was an odd thing, literally feeling your sanity slip away in the matter of seconds.

Mom placed her hand on my shoulder, trying to usher me away, but I smacked her hand away. This was HER FAULT! SHE didn't stop that man from taking Vladi, SHE didn't do ANYTHING! She just sat there and cried like a dumb bitch who only ever thinks about her own pain! My vow echoed in my head... no, I wasn't going to lose him. Not Vladi. Not because of HER stupid mistakes. I'd fix it. I'd make it all better. I took one last glance at my twin, knowing I'd be back for him.

Mom tried to move us away from her mistake, always one to run from her problems. But I couldn't leave. Not without my Vladi. The night before we were to leave, I slipped out. It took forever to dig out Vladi, but I did it. It had only been three weeks since I last saw my twin, and I couldn't help but smile when I pulled him out of that hole. He smelled bad, and he may have been a bit rotted, but it was my Vladi, so I didn't care. I was going to fix him anyway, so it was okay. Everything would be okay. I gave him a piggyback ride home, just like old times, and hid him under my bed. So long as I kept using the air fresheners, I was sure that mother would never notice. She never did, if it had nothing to do with her. I took a while for me to get to sleep, I stayed up until the morning light talking to Vladi. Telling him everything he missed while he was hidden away.

Mom didn't even notice anything wrong with the giant suitcase that I packed out of the house, but the mover did. I saw as soon as he smelled Vladi, the way his face turned grey and he gagged. I got to him before he could question mom. It would have been too risky to end him, though I really wanted too. And I'd do it too. Just who did he think he was, making that kind of face to my brother? As if brother dying wasn't horrible enough, the man had to go and mock his condition by gagging. GAGGING! Heartless asshole. But he hadn't seen Vladi, so it was fixable.

I apologized about the smell and asked him to be careful with the package. I told him it was a science experiment I was working on. He just smiled at me in a pitying way, everyone heard of what happened after all, and said "of course". He was the one to unload Vladi, and even brought him into the shed out back. I thanked him, saying that I would leave a message at the office for him when the experiment was over and tell him all about it. Of course it was a lie. He'd forget after a while, so I didn't really even need to try. After all, he'd think I was crazy if he knew what was in that suitcase, WHO was in that suitcase.

Vladi was kept in my shed, hidden in the upright freezer I saved up for and bought just for him. It took me a while to get it though, so Vladi was quite rotten before I was able to freeze him. Just another thing I would have fix, no big deal really. Mom never went in there, she couldn't even if she wanted to. I had put a bunch of different locks on the door, from the top all the way to the ground. No one could take my twin from me, not now or ever again.

It took a year before I finally found someone too help me fix Vladi, and even longer to be able to actually DO it. The problem was, Necromancy is a Blood Gift. To do it right you had to be born into it. I was not. I tried to find those that were, but none of them would help me. They said that I had to move on, to let him go. I knew I never would, never COULD, and so I kept looking and looking.

Finally I found Doc, he never did tell me his real name. He didn't have the Gift either, but he new how I could learn it myself. It wouldn't be the same, and there would be some consequences. But damn them. I would do anything. Doc stayed by me through the whole thing. I asked why one day, because I knew he didn't really care what happened to me or my brother. He wasn't the type to have such emotions. Sometimes I wonder if he's human. He told me he found me interesting, and he was curious to see where this would go. "Purely personal interest" he said. I should have guessed, this seemed just the thing he'd like to get his hand in on. After all, if he's to be believed, he's a "doctor".

It took me six more years after I found Doc to learn all I could to finally bring a human back. We started small. Squirrels, then cats, then dogs, and so on. It helped that Vladi was only nine. He was small and still developing. Much easier than if he was sixteen like myself. It hit me that he wasn't my twin anymore. He'd be my "little brother". Doc had laughed when I told him. "You're just now realizing that?" but I was fine with it. Anything was fine, just so long as I got him back.

We weren't quite sure what the side-effects would be for doing this. It was kinda up in the air. If I was a born Necromancer, it wouldn't have much side effects. They have a direct link to the afterlife, so it's easier for them to pull a soul back into this plane. But I don't. In order for me to get his soul back, I had to open a gate to the nether world. And the only way for a mortal like me to do that, would be to make a deal with the Devil himself. But I wasn't scared. I had a deal he wouldn't refuse. It would all go fine.

The night of the ritual, I was ready. I made sure that all the lights were off in the house, Vladi hadn't seen light in seven years, so Doc said he'd be sensitive. It was a small price to pay. Candles lit my—OUR—bedroom. I had saved up and bought a lot of stuff I remembered Vladi liked, littering the room with it, as if he'd always been there. Doc helped me get a bigger bed, I couldn't stand the thought of being away from him. Even in my sleep. No, we could share a bed. I had even made sure to drug our mother at dinner. I couldn't have her waking up and ruining it. Everything was all set and ready. The only thing missing, Vladi himself. But that was going to be fixed. At long last.

It was surreal, when Doc set Vladi in the circle. I stepped in with him and prepared to do the most important thing I'd ever do. But I was ready. I could do it. I waited for Doc to step out before I began. I remembered every word and said them all perfectly, not one slip up. I even smiled when everything became hot, and it hardly hurt when I began to seize. I didn't even taste the blood that seemed to force its way up my throat from who knows where. The voice that came from the shadows was nerve-wrecking, and despite the euphoric high I was on, I shivered. It asked me what mortal dared demand its help. I told it that I didn't demand anything from one so great, but that I NEEDED it. That I'd do anything for it. That seemed to please the Beast.

"Anything?" it had asked, and I confirmed. It told me what it wanted, that it would give me my brother, but a demon would also share his body. If I wanted Vladi back, I would also have to take one of its own children. I agreed, but asked if I can make one amendment. It was intrigued.

"My Brother is an innocent. He would not be able to handle one of your children. Please, allow me to take the demon. I can satisfy it better, as I am more capable. I only ask that you allow me to stay with my brother forever. That we will not die again, not without the other. And I promise to forever do your work. I will be your slave to taint." I remember the heat raising, and its horrible, bone-chilling laughter.

"Ah, I had not been so entertained for so long. Very well, you will be a perfect... addition to my collection. I agree to your request, slave. You must think highly of your brother, for him to be worth this to you." I knew Vladi was, so I merely nodded. Again it laughed, louder this time. "Very well..." and then the heat reached its peak.

The shed's walls caught fire, but I couldn't be worried about that. I was too busy dealing with the fire that was eating my skin as the runes from the circle crawled from the floor and up my body. Despite the pain, I forced my eyes to stay open, watching as the runes swarmed my brother too. I fell to my knees but forced myself to crawl over to him. It took so much effort to pull the dagger from my pocket and slit my arms open, the final step. With the last of my energy, I wrapped my arms around the frozen skin of my half rotten brother. I barely noticed that Vladi's skin had begun to soak up my blood, seeming to suck it out of my veins, and slowly started to heal itself. The voice was back.

"And tell Doc, I said hello. He hasn't visited in so long. I miss our talks..." It whispered in my ears. Somehow, I wasn't surprised in the least. If Doc wasn't the Devil himself, then he sure as hell knew him in the very least.

Everything continued to burn, my world consumed in the same flames that was devouring me. And then it all went dark. Everything was so... black. The last thing I heard was a new voice. It seemed to come from my own mind, though I knew it was not me.

"Hello, roomie." It was deep, mocking, and oh so comforting. I fell into the abyss.

Waking up hurt, but it was easily ignored. I was in the middle of what was left of my burned down shed, but that didn't bother me. It served its purpose. Its purpose... BROTHER! I shot up and was met with laughter. Doc stood above me with this smile that held a twisted sense of pride.

"Smug bastard," a voice whispered from within my head. It felt oddly natural, and I couldn't help but give a huge, and probably cheesy, smile. Doc, carried Vladi to our room. I was still to weak to even attempt it, despite wishing I could. After so long without him, I wanted to be the one to finally carry my brother home. But I was proud that I at least had strength enough to drag my own sorry ass up the stairs behind him. I felt rather smug.

"Look at you, being all badass," was the sarcastic voice's reply. I snickered. I refused to go back to sleep after that. I couldn't take my eyes of the rise and fall of the chest of the little figure on my—OUR—bed. I had done it. I HAD DONE IT!

"Cute, for a corpse..." the demon thought, most likely sarcastically but I couldn't tell, before it fell silent.

Nothing could compare to the elation I got when my little treasure began to stir the next morning. Doc stepped out to give us our privacy. I almost cried when Vladi's eyes fluttered open, but I was a monster now, and monsters don't cry. Instead I smiled the biggest smile that I could muster, and softened my eyes the best I could. He couldn't remember anything, and for that I was grateful. It would be a new start, for us both. I was ready for my "Little Brother" I had been waiting for so long. This truly was the sweetest moment of my life. After I answered a couple questions, I brought in Doc, and he checked over my treasure with all the fascination of a sociopath watching a train-wreck. And what a beautiful train-wreck my treasure was. Vladi was awkward at first, but he warmed up to Doc quick enough.

That night, before bed, I took Vladi to see mom. To show her that I fixed her mistake. That it'd be better now. She screamed when she saw him. I was not impressed. When I sent my treasure to bed, I turned on her, letting out the Demon within. We couldn't kill her, not then, as she was still useful. The Demon explained it so much better than I ever could. Its voice burned it into her head, told her that I fixed her mistake in a way that she couldn't deny. No mortal could deny that voice. Not if they wished to live. It made sure she knew that she better not make the same mistake. If I were to lose my treasure again because of her, I would kill her. And no one would even notice, no one would know to miss her. I thought she got the message, that we got it across right. I was wrong. I had forgotten just how stupid she really was.

I should have noticed what she was doing, but I was learning to juggle my new schedule. I had to keep my grades up, couldn't slip. And then I spent my time relearning my brother. He really was such a treasure. Was he always this perfect? Yeah, he really was. And at night, that was when the Demon got his turn. By the first week, everyone knew there was a serial killer. But no-one suspected me. How could they? I was such a great kid. I was perfect. There were no fingerprints, mine were burned away in the fire. No pictures, I couldn't show up properly on film anymore. No DNA either. Funny thing, my blood is gone. I guess I used it all to fix my brother. But my blood was replaced. I now had black ooze running through my veins, but it kept us going, same as blood. And it was less traceable when the demon got a little beat up on the job. Human body and all that, though that was more of an excuse. I realized the very next morning of the demon's first night just how much of a masochist he really is.

None of that was an excuse, I should have noticed. I was furious when my treasure told me. I knew the demon was on the brink of taking over. But it wasn't going to get that one. That one was mine. How dare she treat him like that? It was HER fault he was gone in the first place! She should be grateful he was back! I sent Vladi to bed early and took care of mom that night. She begged for her life, but she didn't deserve mercy. She should have listened. I enjoyed watching the light slowly faded from her eyes as she clawed at my hand, desperate for air. It was so easy! So very easy.

You'd think that I'd regret it. She birthed me, birthed my Vladi, my treasure. But she also let him be taken away. No, I took pleasure in watching her fade. It was so... delicious. After she was gone, I somehow knew how to fix it. It was like breathing, natural. I didn't need to bring back her soul after all. I just needed to re-animate her body. All she was needed for was to work and provide, she was useless otherwise, and you don't need a soul for that. The brain knows what to do. It was fast too, and hardly took up any of my energy. She was hardly damaged, not like Vladi had been.

I knew what I did was right. Vladi's increased happiness was proof enough. I think the demon was proud of me. He bragged about it to Doc while he was looking over mother. We got along so much better after that, the Demon and I. Not that we hadn't before, but now we were kin. Psychos, monsters, killers, family.

I thought things would get better for my treasure once he was in school, but they didn't. When he told me of the bullying, I fixed it quick enough. All I had to do was butcher some animals and leave them on door steps. If they didn't have pets, I used forest animals. It didn't take them long to figure out why, but they couldn't prove who. I know they thought it was my treasure. They were blind. Damning the angel and bowing to the demon. Idiots, the lot of them, but it got the message across. They left him alone.

But that wasn't all. It was odd, I remembered that Vladi used to be such a social butterfly. He was the life of the party, well, the type of party nine-year-olds have. But things were different. Agoraphobic? Vladi? But Doc wasn't surprised. Vladi may not remember, but he was DEAD. He's not human any more so he can't help but avoid them. Subconsciously, he knew, knows he's not one of them. So he doesn't want to be near them, they're different, freaks in Vladi's mind. Even if he knows it or not. I wasn't complaining, it just meant I had my brother to myself. Perfect.

We had been waiting for the side-effects of the resurrection to show. After all, we knew there would be some. I had noticed right away when my brother began to slow down, but I was waiting for him to tell me himself. He needed to realize that he needed to come to me for these things, that he didn't have to hide anything from me. I knew it was only a matter of time. I wasn't surprised at all when he'd shown us his "rash", but I still flinched on the inside. He was rotting again, and I didn't have the blood to fix it. But there was another fix. A way to heal him... a remedy.

Doc and I both agreed it was the only way. I told Vladi of the remedy, told him it was a secret. He didn't argue, such a good boy. I knew he was ready. That night I went out a little early. I needed to find the perfect one for his first meal. It wasn't too hard, with eating habits of people lately. The man wasn't easy to kill. He had some weight on him as advantage. I needed the fat, easier to chew. He fought hard, but I won. It was like a hot knife through butter, slitting his throat ear to ear. The gurgle as he tried to breath through his own blood was like music. I don't know who was laughing harder, me or the demon, but we were mostly the same now, so who cares?

I felt giddy when my treasure took his first bite. The moan of happiness brought a smile to my face. If the lights were on, I know I would've look crazy. But then again, I'm pretty sure I was, and still am. I sat there the whole time, listening to Vladi rip and slurp and chew. I wondered how it tasted, but it was all for Vladi. I was content listening.

Things only got better from there. It became our tradition, every month. I'd kill some fat-ass, my little treasure would eat him (not that he knew what he was eating, as it was much too soon to tell him), and I'd talk to fill the silence. It was comfortable, but I guess not for Vladi. One day he asked me to eat with him. I was surprised, but complied. I'd been curious, but hadn't had the chance to try myself. It was really good, in an raw sorta way. I knew I'd have to start getting more for our dinners. I enjoyed it more than I should have. It was enough to amuse that ever-sadistic demon within me.

My treasure slowly began to change over this year, but it's all good changes. He hates people so much more. I'm going to have to take him out of school soon. I'm thinking about dropping the mom act and just let her disappear. Doc says there's room enough for the both of us to stay with him. He'd never admit it, but he's grown fond of us. I wouldn't call it love, as I doubt he's capable of it, but we really do entertain him. And Vladi's grown so fond of him in return. Things really are shaping up to be just perfect. Only one thing could make this better.

I wonder when my treasure will be ready to be let in on all our little secrets. He's sooo close. Soon... definitely soon.

"Vladi, dinner!"

"Coming, Brother!"

Yeah, soon...

I'm Still Here

I'm Still Here-

I'm Still Here

You may not see me, or even hear me. But I'm still here.

Entertainment is hard to come by nowadays. Most of the time I just lay around and watch the candle light dance across the floor. It's a slow moving existence. I hardly go out, only leaving to look for something remotely edible. Food used to come to me, but there hasn't been anyo... anything appetizing in this house for years. I'd even settle for a pet, but no dice. Still, it's better than being forgotten, I suppose. At least now I'm acknowledged.

"Frankie? It's a horrid name, but I never pay it much thought. Before, I never had a name. Unless you count monster... or it. I suppose Frankie will just have to do.

"Brother told me a secret today." You continue despite my not answering. I never do but it never stops you anyway. I don't really mind, I always listen. After all, it's not as if I have much better to do.

"He says I'm not alive." Oh, so that's finally come out in the open. "I guess I died years ago. Kinda odd to think about." Kinda? You people up there really are crazy. It almost makes me want to laugh.

"But I don't think I mind." That doesn't surprise me in the least. "Brother says I'm still his treasure, so it's okay." You really might want to get that brother complex checked out. Not that it's surprising either. You're nothing compared to that piece of work you call a brother. You're getting close though.

"And he told me about my special dinners too. Did you know I've been eating actual people?" Yes, actually. I could smell the fresh blood and death a mile away. Mind you, the death could be the fact that you're a corpse. The blood however, well you're not exactly "fresh".

"But I don't mind that either. It's just like eating any other animal, right?" Sure, why not? I used to eat people all the time, so I can't exactly judge. Granted though, in my case it's not considered cannibalism.

"I guess it wouldn't matter if I did mind. I can't just give it up. It's my favorite." It was my favorite too, but now I just take what I can get. Things were so much easier when the mere thought of me struck terror into the hearts of my prey. And now I "don't exist". Kids these days...

"And Brother did say that it keeps me from rotting." Then by all means, continue. I absolutely hate the smell of decay. It's just too suffocating.

"At least I know why I feel so out of place around others." Naturally. Ever hear of the wolf in sheep's clothing? I'm sure he didn't exactly feel like he fit in being surrounded by prey either.

"Oh, and that woman is dead too. Brother killed her just for me!" That woman? Oh, must mean the mother. Yes, I knew that as well. She smells worse than you. "Brother still uses her body for work to support us, but he didn't bother with getting her soul back so she's like this mindless drone. It's so cool." Sounds about right, I suppose.

"Vladi, it's time to get ready to go." Ah, the psychopath returns.

"Oh, I better hurry. Brother's taking me 'hunting' with him tonight!" I see. Well, what's a murder between brothers? Sounds like bonding time to me. Bring me a little something back to eat too. I'm famished.

Breathe

Breathe-

Breathe-

Be sure you always remember to breathe.

"Don't forget to breathe, Vladi." Oh yeah. I'm so excited that I can't seem to remember something as simple as breathing. But Brother knows best, so I must try.

Breathe... breathe... breathe...

In, one... two... three... Out, one... two... three...

I can't help myself as I speed up in excitement. It's in sight now!

In, one... two... three... Out, one... two... three...

I can't believe were actually here! And the window's even open! It's almost like an invitation. I squirm in anticipation. It's like it was meant to be.

In, one... two... three... Out, one... two... three...

Brother lifts me in before following silently. This place is pitch black, but that's okay. I can see perfectly fine.

In, one... two... three... Out, one... two... three...

The stairs are easily found, but I pause. Reality hits. This is really happening. A smile breaks across my face and I step up to the first stair, my first step. The groan it makes under foot is oddly satisfying, like the very house is greeting me.

In, one... two... three... Out, one... two... three..

The bedroom door creeks open. There is a light sound of breathing inside, but it stays even. Brother hands me the blade, the same one from his first time, and steps aside to allow me ahead. I don't hesitate this time. I'm ready. I've BEEN ready.

In, one. two. three. Out, One. two. three.

The lump on the bed looks peaceful. This more than anything spurs me to act. The cut isn't clean, but it's only my first time. I go slow enough for the lump to wake, savoring the moment. It's too late for it to do anything. The lumps jerk only to dig the blade deeper into his throat, but not deep enough to make the kill. Not on its own.

In, one two three. Out, one two three.

What a terrible death it must be, to drown in your own blood. But it's so interesting to watch. I stare intently as the light slowly fades from its eyes and its body grows still. It's beautiful.

In, one, two, three. Out, one, two, three.

I can't stop the laughter. It just seems to bubble up out of me. It's high and frantic. Uncontrollable.

In, one, two. Out, one, two.

Out of everything, Brother's smile has got to be the best thing of all. I made him smile! He tells me how proud he is, says it was just like his first time. I beam. I'm just like Brother.

In, one. Out, one.

"Great job, Vladi," I inflate. "Now let's get this home, you must be starved." Now that he mentions it, I really am...

In. Out. In. Out. In. Out.

I'm sure to toss some under the bed for Frankie, just to show him how well I've done. I don't remember food ever tasting so amazingly good. I'm told catching your own food does that somehow. The hunt just makes it all so much better.

In. Out. In. Out.

Brother seems to love it too. This is the first time I get to see his face as we eat it. Of course, there's no reason to eat in the dark anymore. There's nothing left to hide now.

In. Out.

I can't seem to stop myself from scarfing it all down. It's just sooo good.

In...

"Whoa there, slow down. Don't forget to breathe, Vladi." Oh yeah.

In, one... two... three. Out, one... two... three...

Somebody's End

Somebody's End

Somebody's End-

When you can no longer stand an eternity...

Eternity gets get old. It's always the same, nothing's ever new. It doesn't take long to get bored of it. I've hated it for so long. Time just blends together until you no longer notice it's even there. You forget that it still goes on, and you're stuck in the same patterns, same routines. That WAS me, the Damned's eternity.

When you torture as long as I have, it tends to loose all feeling. What once was an art becomes automatic action. It used to be fun, listening to the screams and the pleas. They all plead, begging for a mercy I never had or ever will have in me. A mercy I'd never give. It used to be such sweet music. And then you realize it never ends. There is no silence or death there. Just an everlasting noise that goes on and on until it's a constant hum. What once was so enticing becomes nothing more than background. An old song you always recognize but hardly register. It didn't take me long to crave silence, crave to be the one to silence. And I got my chance. My new life started with two words.

'Hello, Roomie.' Excitement was new to me, as were most emotions. Impatience was new too, as I never had anything to look forward to. It seed that when one had forgotten time, it would smack you in the face with a horridly slow comeback. That night was to be a new chapter in my existence, to be part of a world more twisted than Hell itself. But time had decided it would make me WAIT.

When the Boy finally fell asleep, it was my turn to play. I had thought it would've been easy, it would have been no problem for a being such as I, but I was wrong. That was something new too. The first couple hours was learning to walk in a strange body. It wouldn't fucking work, I was just too- detached. I could hardly feel the fucking mortal body! And then came the arms. Doors shouldn't have been that damned hard to open! Then the steps were jerky as hell as I walked down the road. And then, on top of it all, it took forever to find a place. I had bypassed house after house looking for the right one. They say you never forget you're first, so mine HAD to be perfect.

When I finally found the house, I knew it immediately. It was like it called to me. I couldn't silence the steps as I approached, I still didn't have the control. And I was restless to begin with. In retrospect, that on top of my temper probably wasn't a good precedent. The front door was locked, so I had to clumsily make my way round the house. To my fury, the back was locked too. I had taken enough time finding the Damned place. I wasn't wasting my time with that shit. So I did the "next best thing"... at least, it felt like it at the time. I threw a rock through the window.

The arms were shaky as I tried to haul the Boy's body weight up and through the new opening. It was a very uncoordinated attempt, pathetic if I'm honest. It was then, when I fumbled and fell into the house, that I experienced something else new for me. The Boy's hands and knees were sliced open on the broken glass I fell on. I was experiencing pain foe the first time. Shock froze me as the new sensation shot up the foreign limbs. I watched, stunned, as black sludge oozed out of deep gashes. I didn't know how to react, what to do. For the first time, I felt terror. It was too much, too strong to understand it all at once. Time, excitement, pain, terror. It all wouldn't stop. Things I never had before attacked me all at once. I was shutting down.

One thought seemed to echo in this shared mind. Pain HURT. Everybody knows it, but to FEEL it... and I shouldn't have felt it. This wasn't MY body, MY limbs, or MY injuries. None of this was mine. But I DID feel it. It was real, it was my own. In that moment, a truly terrifying realization had struck me. The Boy's pain, his LIMITATIONS were now MINE. I, once so powerful, now held the capabilities of a KID. I didn't know how to react. I was in over my head, another in this long line of horrid firsts.

I don't know how long I stood there, but it was obviously too long. In my shocked daze, I hadn't seem or heard the movement, but I felt the new onslaught of pain as it burst across the back of the head. I didn't understand the white that had overtook any vision I had in this dark house. I was even more confused when the white changed into odd colors that seemed to just dance across its black background. There was a loud ringing in the ears, too loud. I hardly felt the borrowed body hit the ground. What had just fucking happened?

The ringing tried to drown out a new voice that seemed to come out of nowhere.

"Who the fuck do you think you are, punk? I'll teach you a lesson! You picked the wrong fucking house tonight!" A man swam into my vision. Even if I was standing, the man above me was a good two feet taller than my host's body, not to mention thrice the muscle mass. He was defiantly not happy to be awoken like he was. I really should have found another way in. Fucking window and, while I'm at it, fucking hindsight. The next second, the man was raising his weapon, a bat, and bringing it down hard. The muted thud was sickening, and it was accompanied by that trice damned pain. But he didn't stop with that. He kept going and going. The asshole wasn't "teaching me a lesson", he was trying to fucking kill me! And all I could do was curl up like the pathetic mortal I resided in and wrap the Boy's arms around his head in a vain attempt to protect at least that one body part. Black sludge slid into eyes, burning them. It seemed to be everywhere.

Just when I thought that I couldn't take anymore, I noticed something else new. A thud thud thud in the chest that I must have previously disregarded. But I couldn't disregard it then, because it was getting loud. It seemed to overpower the ringing, and it reached EVERYWHERE. I could feel it throughout the body: from the toes that I realized were curled, to the fingers that seemed to be twitching, to even the top of the head that was no doubt split open. In that moment, everything came into focus. Every bit of the boy's, of OUR body. Because I could finally feel myself in it too. It was my body just as much as his.

With this epiphany came another realization too. Every ache that accompanied the thud in our chest didn't seem so bad after all. When I concentrated on it, it seemed to almost pleasant. In fact, the throbbing was starting to feel great, no more like REALLY FUCKING GOOD. How had I not realized that till then? The moan that escaped with this realization was cut off by my own laughter, and that quickly bubbled into uncontrollable hysterics. It was a less than sane sound, I wasn't aware we could reach such a pitch. It made the man freeze mid swing, and I took advantage. With new found dexterity, I shot our arm out and ripped the bat from him with surprising strength and was standing in a second. I mentally followed the pain down our free arm, and I easily raised it to wipe the sludge from our eyes. To think all it took was thudding and pain to give me such awareness. And with awareness comes control. It was really that simple. My crazed smile was all I needed to make the man take a step back, and I followed step for step. I was there for a reason after all.

I've always believed in the give and take way of existence, and this was no different. He gave me his beating, so now he'd take mine. He never had a chance to run. With adrenaline running through our bloodless veins, I was on him in a fraction of a second. I didn't stop swinging even after the thunks became wet and soft. I don't know how many times I hit him, I had lost count about half way though, but he stopped screaming after the twenty-seventh hit and stopped whimpering after thirty-something. He sure hung in there. It was all so perfect. Finally, finally! I was no longer the damned's eternity. In that moment, I was that man's end.

I can remember every step I took after all was said and done. I relished in the ache of every movement, the twinges of pains made small moans escape grinning lips. It just hurt so god damned good! I had made I only two blocks away when the sirens pierced the air. What a slow response! But they were much too late. I ducked into the shadows and made my way home—my new home—with a sad amount of ease. The police here was, is, and probably always will be pathetic.

Killing never gets old. It's always different, never really the same. It didn't take long to get addicted to it. I wanted it for so long, and now it's mine. There is no more eternity, only one night after the other, and each the last for someone new. And there is me, someone's end.

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