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A Love to Die For

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"I love you. I don't care who knows. I would do absolutely anything for you. I love you....."

John wasn't always so emotional. His dad died fighting in the Gulf War when he was only 3. His mom tried so hard to be good but she always knew that John wouldn't ever be completely fixed from that morning when the men in the white hats and blue jackets showed up at his door to tell him his daddy died. John was just emotionless. That was until middle school, where he meant the person who would give his innocence back.

Sixth grade went by with a monotone feel and utterly slow pace. John only made a few friends. He had always seen the special person in pre-algebra, but never paid any attention to her. Seventh grade was a changing year for John. He made a lot more friends. People started to actually get to know him and that allowed John to trust them enough to, at the least, talk to them outside of class. Nobody knew John's main problems though. Starting that same year, he had taken drugs from a friend at his house. John loved the marijuana. It eased him and made him feel numb from the depression which inhabited his life. It made him happy. He grew his hair out and got happy with life. He met a girl.

Not the girl from pre-algebra a year before. No, the girl in pre-algebra was too pristine for his tastes at the time. She had class. She had a particular tone about her that just reeked high-quality woman. But this wasn't that girl. This girl, the girl with a drinking and drug problem, she was good for one thing, and that was how she could make John feel. Emotionally and physically. She met his sexual fantasies any day he asked. But, she did much more than that to him mentally. Some things that... should have never happened.

This girl, Rita, she had a tendency to work on the wrong side of things. She had a messed up childhood, containing her family being abused, and this same man dying of alcohol poisoning when he was finally starting to shape up. She wanted the pain to go away. So, she enlisted in the aid of the Dark One. She thought maybe if the soldiers of hell could give her what she wanted, she'd be happy. So, she sold the most important aspect of her God had entrusted to her. Her soul. She got what she wanted. Striking good looks. Always looking pristine no matter her eating, drinking, or drug doing habits. But, whatever man she loved and had a relationship with, never really loved her. Until she took John into her heart.

John and Rita shared a very explicit relationship. But the emotions always ran high. They were deeply in love. The minions of Hell decided that they didn't want Rita to be too satisfied, too.... happy. They were sent to take the life of John. Rita enlisted in other otherworldy help for a different price to save John, so she wouldn't have to try. Unfortunately, one demon got loose during the chaos, and went for Rita. Rita, being the self-absorbed toad she was, sent it off to go mess with other people. Rita and John broke up afterwards, because of the doings the demon saved for them, by tempting Rita to hurt John once more. They never spoke again.

Eighth grade. John was alone again, and on the bright side, off of drugs. John was closing up again except for a small loop of friends who always stuck with him. He did let in one special person though, who had never made fun of him or hurt him. That was Alice. Alice was a beautiful young lady. She had the body of a goddess, soft skin that felt pleasing just to feel brushed up against you, and beautiful eyes, that unless you were up close, looked green or hazel time to time.

Alice proved to be the best of anybody to John. Alice and John started out just talking every once in a while, but John didn't like this. He was comfortable with Alice, but he wanted to know her better. He began opening up to her, something he had never done for anybody else before. He told her about his father's death in Kuwait. He told her about the attempted suicide over Rita. He told many, many things that he wouldn't tell the good Lord himself.

John felt something new inside. He felt like he couldn't leave Alice's side, similar to how a puppy follows its master. He felt something more than he did with Rita. It was love. Pure, unscathed, flawless love. Not just the love he thought he felt when Rita would get him off before. He was in love with Alice and he wanted her to be his forever and ever. But alas... she had gotten a boyfriend. He was an emotional dolt with a big gut and a nasty personality.... but John wished he were him. Just the opportunity to hold Alice made him melt. One day as they were talking, John told Alice how he was so deeply in love with her, but Alice responded with only a shrug, which he expected. She told him she had a boyfriend, and for what it's worth, she loved him like a brother. John played it cool with her, pretending it was fine to him. But little to her knowledge, he cried sleepless nights wishing he were her man.

Time went on. John still loved Alice with every fiber of his being, but he knew she would never be his, so he dated another girl, who we'll call, the song of his life. They constantly had their ups and downs, especially when he moved to Colorado. Oh the last day was terrible. The last day he had with all of his old friends... it tested his ability to not cry anymore. It was the hardest when he had to see Alice cry. Alice cried and John just her to be the strong sister she was to him, wanting to tell her, so much, that he wanted her to be his forever. He wanted to kiss her and cry with her... but he couldn't. Oh how John cried over the song of his life, but Alice too, for the weeks on end.

The 2nd half of the 8th grade year passed. John had to spend it with minimal people in Colorado, and closed up again. He talked to his girlfriend, the song of his life, but it wasn't the same anymore. But, with Alice, nothing ever changed. They talked, but he still felt his heart yearning for her, to be by her side again, like the puppy he was. But that summer, he was able to come to Kentucky and stay with a friend. He got to see Alice! How HAPPY he was! That was until the last night he was there...

The last night he was there, he had promised to sneak out to Alice's house to watch Full Metal Jacket, a great movie by Stanley Kubrick, eat recipes of his, and say his last goodbyes to Alice. He knew he would have to hold in his crying again and be rough and tough for the audience of her two gazing eyes, but when he got there, well, he expected to see her waiting in the basement with the tele tuned to the DVD with the food made. Instead, he came in to see Alice lying there, crying, with cuts on her wrist. He came close, and her body was lurched into the air, seemingly impossible. Than a surprise came to his face.

A black shape began to take place. The black shape had a body seemingly made of gas, which was holding Alice by the head as she cried silently, with blood running down her wrists. The figure told him that he was the same one that tempted Rita, and that he wasn't going to go back to hell without one more soul. John just stood there in horror. His girl, his love, she was hurt. Blood running down her wrists.... John was confused. John wondered why Alice. Why HER!? But the figure seemed to know his thoughts, or so he thought. See, before John left, he wanted Alice to know how he felt about her, so he left her a note through Facebook that he KNEW she wouldn't see until after he was on his plane the next afternoon when she woke up.

The demon had been trying long and hard to find John's weakness, but when he saw this while ravaging through John's friends Facebook accounts, it was more than enough. He hurt Alice enough so that she wouldn't fight back when he held her hostage. Unfortunately, she had gone unconscious by the point and had no idea to know what was going on, so the demon began his deal. The demon told John that it was either her soul, or his. He told John that if he gave the demon his soul, that he would suffer eternal damnation forever in hell, but if he took Alice's soul, she'd be forever depressed, just a former shell of herself, but suffering the same consequence John would.... Tearfully contemplating his decision, he caved and gave the demon his soul...

Alice came to later but her memory erased of what happened the night before. Where was John? Did he blow her off? That was what she thought as of course, she just remembers falling asleep in the basement, waiting for John.

Upon walking to the door to go get the morning paper for her parents, she found a note.

"Check your Facebook" -John

When she logged on later, this is what she saw, "I love you. I don't care who knows. I would do absolutely anything for you. I love you. 'I would kill, and die, even give my soul to the wrong side of the spectrum for you..."

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